Sunday, May 15th, 2011 10:19 PM

Wow I am tired. Like really really really tired. Just ended tuition and already I feel like I am on fire.

It has been 5 days since I last blogged (wow), and I can’t really remember what happened this week. All I know was that there were like a million papers and that it was tough. It wasn’t as tough as last week, but it was still tough.. to the bone.

Today!!! Went cycling with cousins, was really fun, double-biked with en because i was scared of falling and he was nice enough to bike with me. Jun offered but I turned him down LOLOLOLOL due to someboooodyyyy

But it was fun, although now I feel like I could go to sleep any friggin moment. Really don’t feel like bathing….

BAHHHHHH

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Tuesday, May 10th, 2011 1:48 PM

To Rachel Phua:

I don’t know why am I doing this. Haha.

Hmm. There’s so much things to say about you. You are one of the many best friends I have, (I know its not that honorable to share the title of a ‘best friend’ with moomoo, ducky, lumpy, bear, gabriel, trrjs), and you’re also one of the best listeners (besides justina, sheena, and rachel s, kim and val) I can go to without any worries of being judged or criticized. This is really good because the best advice usually comes from you and so far everything in my life is working out fine!

You helped me out in many of my sticky situations, most of them of which I caused myself. Thanks, I guess, for sticking by me for this 1.5 years SO FAR, and influencing me to believe that Jesus actually exists with your predictions and the strange phenomenons. I don’t usually do dedications to my friends on my blog, but you’re special because you’re not afraid to be you even when there’s so much backstabbing and betrayal surrounding your everyday life. And also because I didn’t get you your pooh and I felt guilty.

You are also extremely easy to talk to, despite the fact that we have so little common interests together. You like Final Fantasy, I like Disney cartoons. You like taiwan/korean drama serials, I love hongkong drama and can’t stand the sappy love stories taiwan/korean dramas tend to show. You are an extremely talented musician (don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise), I smoke my way through my 4 years in Guitar Club because my timing always goes off and I can’t play the right notes for nuts. The only thing we actually have in common is our deep deep love for the Harry Potter series.

However, despite all these, we still click perfectly well and I am extremely grateful for that. I still wonder what would have happened if you didn’t sit beside Rachel on the first day of school last year. Would we still be extremely close, or would you be good friends with the boys instead? Anyway, I thank God that you chose to sit there, if not I would probably never have been so close to you.

I still remember all the great times we shared. Like the times when you dragged me to church, and I tried my very best not to fall asleep during the sermons, but I still did anyway. Or that time where we went to KBOX, and I was feeling extremely cold from drinking 4 glasses of honey-lemon, and I stole your jacket and you started to freeze up because you were wearing a tank and we ran to the toilet for warmth… but there was none. Our fingers were extremely stiff and when we finally got out of the kbox place I think we rushed to get warm air.

And now you will never go kbox with me again because I don’t sing and all I do is gorge myself with water. I like water.

Haha! Oh well. There was also that time this year when I lost my phone, and you suggested we tail the thief and force her to give it back, but instead we went to report the lost phone and I never saw my phone or that lady again. Thank you for your never-ending prayers during that time, but I guess God wanted me to never be careless with the things/people I treasure again.  However, I am sure I found a true friend in you and Rachel S during that period of time because you guys stayed with me when I was in despair, when I was worried, anxious, nervous, even when your stomachs were growling like crazy you guys still stayed by me. You two were also the first two people I told about the ‘secret’, and I was shocked and stunned to see that you guys 1) didn’t freak out and 2) were totally supportive of whatever I was doing.

There were also those times when you predicted stuff that I was so sure was never going to happen, but it did anyway, like the fact that you-kn0w-who liked me, or when you said that the War in Europe was definitely coming out for Prelim I. BTW even though I didn’t believe you I still had faith in you and thus I was actually supporting you so do not say I am not a good friend hahahah.

You also listened to me when I had friendship problems, and vice versa. The good thing about you is that I can voluntarily help you buy stuff and give you advice without feeling reluctancy. Did you know you’re the first person that I have never actually been reluctant to help before- for fear that it might not benefit me in future? I guess it must be your ‘Gryffindor-ish’ behaviour rubbing off on my ‘Slytherin-like’ personality.

You are also an extreme perfectionist, which is creepy to no end, and you need a break once in a while! You are also a ‘threat’ now because you’re working so hard, which makes me worried that I might not have put in enough effort because I play too much. I guess thats a good thing though, because my dad hopes this tendency of yours to get everything done will rub off on me and I would be more hardworking. Unfortunately, its not and I am still as lazy as ever.

Both you and I are a little crazy, I can say that, although I think I am more of an embarrassment than you. It is fun hanging out with TRRJS because Rachel and Sheena would be the calm and collected ones, while you, Justina and I would go crazy and just have fun. Now that I think of it, its like Rachel and Sheena are the mothers of the group. OK maybe just Rachel because she’s the calmest person I have ever seen. Must be the influence of having older siblings.

And I have no internet while I am typing this, so I have to beg my dad for extra 5 minutes of Internet just to post this. I am so nice! Anyway. To sum this up, I guess the best part about you is still the fact that you’re so honest, naive (haha), innocent (not xmm innocent but pure), and that you got nothing to hide. And that you’re just you, and you don’t give a damn about the opinions of others. I don’t know why the others AHEM don’t see that they are missing out on something great in life by not having you around, but I know I am missing out on nothing because you’re one of the greatest people I have ever met.

BTW you aren’t dumb at all. Don’t ever think that way because its just your self esteem and your perfectionist personality talking. If you were dumb you probably won’t even know the importance of studying (tadah this is me) and lastly, I love you AS A FRIEND and while you’re reading this I hope you know that you’re wasting valuable time studying and that you should really sleep because it is late.

OK! Thats all. I sure beat your old post in your blog dated 14 Oct 10. BTW you haven’t updated yet. You promised to update and you didn’t! WHAT IS THIS!!!!!

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Monday, May 9th, 2011 10:52 PM

… about my previous post and why it was so sad.

I was upset because I quarrelled with someone, and I felt extremely bad because the fight was also sparked off by me, in a way.

Anyway! I am here to blog to cancel off the sad post, so… what did I do during the weekend?

Saturday:

Woke up @ 11. Successfully bought moshpit tix for KMW!!!!!

Dragged dad and mum to eat lunch at ION Orchard, because I saw the prettiest, fluffiest, lightest, most angelic white dress ever. So I begged and pleaded with daddy to buy it, and he did, unwillingly because it cost a hefty sum of 80$.

And I really liked one of the salesgirls @ the store (cant remember the name, because mummy and I got lost there on friday and happened to pass by the store), because she was so helpful and extremely nice!!! The dress only had Medium on the rack, so I managed to sum up the courage to ask her to help me check for a Small. I know, being in Drama Club = having courage and being confident, but I am still a teensy weensy nervous and afraid that she would blow me off.

She didnt, which was good, but there was no small, which was bad :( But being positive and all, I went with mummy to still try on the dress, and even though it was a little loose, it was still extremely pretty (I am not sure that I will look pretty wearing it, but yea you get my point that the dress is EXTREMELY pretty)

Mummy decided that OK it was worth buying, so we asked the girl (not the salesgirl, the GIRL) at the fitting room counter whether there was a new piece. The girl blew us off and said no there wasn’t any left, so we were quite disappointed but determined to buy it!! My mummy wanted to shop around the store so I stood there holding the dress and walking around like an idiot, and found really really pretty clutches and accessories but they were so expensive I couldn’t get them. I did get a little flower pin though hehehehe

I decided to re-try my luck and ask the salesgirl that helped us check for the small size whether there was a new piece of Medium. Waited for a loooong while and we thought she had forgotten about us but she came out and said that there was a SMALL size available and that she didn’t see it ‘cuz it was wedged in between the other clothes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! See me showing off my extreme happiness. LOL

So I went to try the Small, which was good because it was an exact fit and I bought that so yayyy (or rather dad bought it)!!!

Went to eat burger king later and I like their Caramel sundaes hehehe.

Went home, tried on the dress, got scolded by mummy because I was supposed to be studying, and yea thats it for saturday.

It was also election polling/results day, so dad invited hui and ling to stay over to watch the elections. I fell asleep halfway though.. although I heard the guy announcing the results eventually became extremely popular overnight.

Sunday:

MOTHERS DAY AND JUSTINA’S BIRTHDAY!

At first I totally forgot it was her bday until I saw facebook sorry babe.

Waited for mummy to go out of the house before going to Tampines 1 to get her two pink roses. OK I wanted red, but there wasn’t any, so I took pink. Anyway, I got my deary to accompany me because my dearest cousins Ling and Xing were ignoring me on twitter. We were standing in the shop and I felt totally ignored LOL because the florists were busy doing their own things. Then I realized we had to take the flowers on our own so I took them, paid and I wanted the water thing but they didnt have it (I was disappointed ‘cuz the water thing WAS COOL)

So deary and I went to eat MOS burger (I love MOS) and Takopachi at TM! I like MOS. Seriously because MOS burger is nice. And I really like MOS burger. Nuff said. Period. Full stop. MOS BURGER, DESPITE THE FACT THAT SOMETIMES YOU RUN OUT OF BUNS AND DRINKS, I STILL LOVE YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR MAYO AND MILK TEA!! And maybe also because your food doesnt taste metallic, like the how the fish burgers taste sometimes at McDee.

Walked home, did a mom’s day card for mummy and waited patiently for her to get back. Waited for about 2 hours, she came home, I continued waiting for her to notice the roses while she panicked on whether the denim pants she bought for gabriel @ esprit would fit him or not. Daddy was subtly signalling to her but she didn’t notice either. This shows how clueless my mum actually is.

Anyway, she finally saw it, squealed a little, and hugged me. I like doing things on mummy day.

But NOOOO my brother overruled my gift with a HANDMADE IPHONE4 COVER! Damn! Oh well I should be more creative next time.

Monday:

School holiday! < Happy happy.

There was no chance to sleep however because deary dragged me out to breakfast early. I had to wake up at 7.15AM. I slept at 12.30AM. Dang it :(

Ate Macdonalds before rewatching Thor. I like Thor hes cute :) And it was really fun though! I ate pastamania! I like their pizza. I think thats probably the only thing I like there. Then we sat in our usual spot talking about random stuff, I guess. That was until 4PM though :\ I came home, slept until 6.30 before eating dinner and finishing up my Math tuition work.

I am proud to say that I achieved an A2 on my paper 2 for the mock-test, yay, and I finished it within 2 hours (which is good). My tcher also bought for me the cutest pink bottle cap ever so now my nalgene bottle is ‘customized’. Haha. OK its 11pm now and I should sleep. Someone please wake me at 10 tomorrow to get ready for school, since my amath paper is at 1115 wheeee

I should also mug for history. Dang it.

(Have I told you lately, that I love you? )

Tricia with a big smile says byeeee!

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Friday, May 6th, 2011 11:06 PM

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Friday, May 6th, 2011 11:03 PM

Did I mention that I hate crying?

I don’t want to write on Twitter, or on Facebook, so I will just write it here because I want you to see this but yet at the same time I don’t want to say it out loud on MSN because later it escalates into another fight again

And I guess now there’s such things as a tear for a tear because im sitting in the exact same position as you were crying my balls out

I am so sick of this because every day something like this happens and it just brings my day down to like minus zero

I don’t want to talk to anyone now I am going to probably tell you goodnight sleep my ass off after I bathe and hopefully tomorrow will be a nicer day

Maybe its the exhaustion talking, and I am sorry for everything

Please I hope that tomorrow we won’t fight again

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Thursday, May 5th, 2011 7:08 PM

I officially believe predictions made by Rachel P.

I mean, who hits the nail right on the head so damn accurately? She told me yesterday that she had a premonition (its so mystical when I use big words) that she saw the word ‘appeasement’ on the question paper for Source Based Questions. Btw, that was yesterday, and the we took the paper today.

So you can imagine my face when I saw Section A (sbq). I was smiling and grinning to myself like an idiot because it really came out. Haha. Maybe Mrs Yee and Rachel have some sort of affinity. Hmmm….

Oh well. Anyway, I did not blog because I was way too busy mugging for History and Social Studies. History was today, and I was so scared because I didn’t study much for History (only the Cold War), and the chapter on the Cold War is so heavy! Thankfully, the questions that came out were dead easy. I did one of the questions before- in a class test and we even had the answers for that! The other question was just about the reasons for cold war.

Ah I am so happy now! I was totally worried for nothing (although it is probably God’s grace because I wasn’t prepared at all) and I pulled it through today. Tomorrow its Social Studies/Biology. Sigh. I’m probably gonna get another bad grade for Biology and I feel so bad because I can make it if I study hard enough, but it’s so boring I can’t help it!

Apart from studies, I really have nothing else to blog about now. Oh! My mom got the white iPhone 4 yesterday. This really broke my heart, because it was so pretty, and I really liked it, but it was given to my mother. :( But on the bright side, I got her old phone so I can now officially have ringtones and SMS tones! The theme is a little screwed up which made me very pissed off, but oh well :(

I need to study biology now! Wish me luck guys~

Have been praying for every single exam. Some say its superstition, but it calms me down before the exam starts. Like I have someone to put my faith into, to trust, that even if I do badly, everything will somehow turn out right. Should I go to church this week? Or not?

PS I like God!

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Sunday, May 1st, 2011 11:01 AM

Everytime my cousins come over, I am excited.

And then I slip back into the notion of being anti-social and just sticking to my laptop.

Why is it so hard to click with them? Its like we are on different pages. This really sucks.

So anyway, went to Paradise Dynasty today to eat. Again. The atmosphere was weird, everything was just.. ick. Thankfully I got a text-partner so I don’t feel lonely.

I really like the xiaolongbaos! ‘They’ really cheered me up. I also bought my ‘I am Number Four’ book, and the cover isn’t the weird green-and-yellow one, or the Alex Pettyfer one, but the really nice blue-and-green one! Ah so happy. I shall be reading it tonight because I have nothing else to do because my cousins + brother are busy frolicking away with my dad on ebay, and I am so jealous because I don’t do these kind of things with my dad. Major wtf. This is totally unfair. Wish I was computer illiterate, then maybe my dad would spend more time with me.

Hmmmm. I had a really stressful time this week. SYF was this week, got a Bronze for Guitar, was extremely sad, and yet I still have to put up with the shit some INACTIVE seniors decided to post on facebook. Seriously. We only said these derogoratory stuff because we felt that we deserved at least a Silver, but we didn’t get it. You hardly even come for practice, and you dare say that we should just deal with the fact that we got a Bronze. Shit you.

To my juniors: I am proud of you, and even though we didn’t meet our own expectations, we still did very well and we should all be proud of that.

What else, what else….

Okay. Then on wednesday I felt like crap. With a capital C, so its now Crap. Why? I don’t know. Maybe because I was too tired from the SYF and everything. The good thing was that I went to watch Source Code and it was pretty dang awesome! I really like Jake Gyllenhaal (sp?) because hes cute and the girl was exceptionally pretty as well. I was also extremely happy because this person whose name I shall forever keep in my heart was there too.

On thursday: Still feeling like crap.

Friday: Felt a little bit less crappy because I was going to watch Thor!

I like Thor. He’s hot. But Jane and Sif were like total goddesses so I believe that Hollywood actresses and actors are extremely lucky people and my ego is reduced to the size of a peanut because I feel so inferior compared to them :( Chatted for awhile, and came home to some bad news and interrogation. Really hate that feeling.

Saturday (which is today): Things got slightly better, I had no voice though for the first half of the day, but it got better after awhile.

I am seriously so freaking happy today despite the wide variety of feelings I have been feeling within the past 24 hours alone. Tomorrow is Sunday, which means I have to study History, but I don’t mind because I like history and that I don’t get to talk to people I don’t want to talk to for fear that more sad feelings might come up again. I hate being sad.

Seriously. Sometimes its like having a hammer (thor’s hammer heheh) being whammed into your chest. Sometimes its just feeling your heart break. Sometimes its having to know that people are judging your actions wrongly. Sometimes it feels like suicide.

BUT I AM NOT SAD NOW SO I SHOULD STOP DWELLING ON THESE ANNOYING FEELINGS

I miss you.

—

This was originally posted on the 30th of April, but since my wordpress deliberately didn’t want to work on that day, so I am posting it one day later. Tadah!

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